disillusioned

i hurt
i know where
the physician said she’s good
he told she has never been better
yet i hurt and i know where
the void within,
the place the instrument was
the me in me
it hurts
how do i heal
i tried it all
medicines, tonics, prayers, meditations
temples, mosques, rivers, jungles et all
nothing soothes, no one heals anymore

all temporary, they make me smile
i come back disillusioned,
to the clutches of this insane sadness

i keep looking out
n think of flying
i keep looking in
n think of leaving
leaving it all
if he promises
not to bring me back

we’ll cuddle up and pretend a smile again
lest we run away screaming
we will lock the doors too

the room, a rug, a warm embrace
lets close our eyes and sleep
i dream, a bitter dream
my world is lost
like a broken star
its falling away
i see it vanishing
wishing to wave it goodbye
i wake him up
the trail is left
thats all

what do i show
its all empty

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